How I got into p.orn

It's no secret that the jubley's take a turn for the enormous when one is in my condition. I have always been a fairly endowed girl so I looked forward to the increase in bustline with enthusiasm.

In the beginning, it was fantastic. Tiny little pouch of a belly, big honking bewbies.

But as the belly got bigger, so did the girls. So I went to our old friends at VS this weekend to have these ponies measured.... Let's just say the porn industry is the only place you can find a 32E. I'll be sticking with sports bras, kthanksbye.

I made an off schedule appointment with Dr. Piece of Cake today because I've been feeling generally run down lately, flu like, and lots of pelvic pressure.

At the end of the ultrasound, blood pressure monitoring, temperature taking, oxygen monitoring she told me it was normal pregnancy progression and to get the hell over it. Which I will promptly try to do.

My little hostage is getting bigger and bigger. And the living quarters are getting smaller and smaller. Turns out his head is lodged in my vag, which explains the pelvic pressure and vag pain I've had for the last 4 days. I asked Dr. POC how we could get him out of that position.

Dr. POC: Oh, he'll be out of that position in about 3 months.

Me: Who brought the comedian?

And then I punched her. And cried.

Apparently the preshus little bug is unlikely to move. He will just get bigger... and bigger... and bigger. Fun. I told K to imagine a bowling ball lodged in his rectum. That's right, think about THAT for the rest of the day while you're in meetings at work. Your welcome.

Anyways, I'll continue my quest to "getting over it." Wish me luck.